Persevere in Patience

Two blogs in a week!? I guess snow/ice days do serve a purpose or maybe I shouldn't be so lazy and write more?.... 3 months later. Ok So I was going to delete this first sentence because obviously I didn’t finish this blog entry when I initially started back in February, but thought it would give it character by leaving it. Now trying to remember what I was going to say….hmmm

Well my faithful readers, those who read to kill a blue jay, already know that I started hunting at a very early age. If you didn't read that post, well now you know hunting and being outdoors was something transcribed into my DNA from my father, his father, his father etc. etc. Don’t worry this doesn’t end badly like it did for the baby duck…

Deer hunting was something I did faithfully every year until I went off to college when my schedule got busier and we lost our lease. So with that said, I had not been deer hunting for about 8 years and I finally got to go this past December! You can imagine the amount of excitement and anticipation I had when invited to go on this hunt. I can’t explain it, but I seriously come alive when outdoors and it was a much needed escape from the city to enjoy some masculine activities.

The morning hunt was designed to let some of the guys who had never been hunting take the first shots. Therefore, I did not have a gun but served as a guide or mentor instead (you can’t imagine how difficult this was for me, but I submitted) and ps ask Justus about his experience ha. I didn't think I would get to officially "hunt" since we could only take 3 does and there were about 4 guys who had never hunted before and they were obviously top on the list. Regardless, I was excited to be in the woods. However, due to prior engagements… Christmas parties, 2 of the 4 had to leave after the morning hunt because the “ladies” needed them there. Whatever. I didn’t mind because that meant I would get to hunt that evening!

So after an afternoon of shooting targets, competition and blowing things, up it was now time to return to the woods. I chose not to take a gun, instead I wanted to challenge myself and go bow hunting since I had never tried it before. I positioned myself in a tripod about 20 yards from the feeder at approximately 3:30 pm, just in time for the sun to start its descent and remain in my eyes the remainder of the evening. Now I need to preface some things about myself in order for this to bear any weight or fruit. I’m not the most patient person. In fact when I was a child, in the period of time when my mom would fill up my bottle and place it in the microwave to warm it up, I would already be screaming “I want my bobble and I want it now!!” Geez kid chill and suck on the pacifier. In fact it was the lack of patience for my campers one summer that brought me to the end of my rope and the Word of God which eventually led to my spiritual awakening. So let’s just say I’ve come a long way but definitely prone to do things myself or get irritated if things don’t happen in the time frame that I think they should. I.e. traffic and I fight a lot.

Anyways back to the hunt… 15 minutes go by, nothing. 30 minutes go by, I hear something behind me and I get excited but it’s just a dumb squirrel. One hour passes still nothing, much of this time my vision is limited because I’m trying to avoid looking out straight and risk any permanent eye damage from the bright sun. Confession, smart phones had not been invented when I went hunting growing up and so every now and then when I got bored I would pull out my phone and check facebook or something haha. I repent… 2 hours of not seeing one deer surpasses, my phone’s almost dead and I am now fidgety and antsy as can be. BUT then… I look over to my left and about 200 yards out I see 3 deer grazing in the field. I look down at my watch and realize I maybe have 30 minutes of daylight left. At the rate they were walking and the direction they were heading, there was no way they’d make it to close enough to me before the sun had set. If I had a gun that would be fine, but I had a bow and arrow and last I checked I wasn’t Robin Hood and William Wallace uses a sword so basically I needed to be closer. I quickly decided to try and sneak my way to get into position where I could possibly take a shot. I scurry through the woods last of Mohican style (crouching) and pop out, legs burning, panting, about 50 yards from where they were. At this point I am close enough to see them clearly, and to my disappointment they are very small bucks, probably just hitting puberty.

I watched them graze for several minutes before deciding I needed to get back to the stand and fetch my flash light before it got too dark. I walked slowly back through the woods hoping that tomorrow morning my luck might be better. As I come out to the clearing on the other side, I abruptly stop in my tracks because I spotted deer at the feeder. They are looking right at me so if I move they’d run away. Finally after what seemed like a long stare down, they slowing lose interest in me and continue eating the corn. I however was stuck in a spot about 80 yards too far to do anything about it. There were about 3 nice size bucks along with their girlfriends and I had to watch them from a distance as the sun slowly set behind the hills.

During that time God really started to speak to me about patience and how if I would have only waited 5-15 more minutes, He would have brought them to me. Instead I was distracted by something in the distance and decided to act on my own free will. I then started to think about all the times I had been impatient and tried to make things happen on my own and the consequences from those decisions. And I was really struck with conviction from my lack of trust in God at times and how it was fleshed out in impatience.

How many of us have tried to walk in the will of God, remaining steadfast in His calling, only to be distracted or led astray because too much time had passed and we gave into the lie that He forgot about us? Is this not similar to what happened to Abraham when he took matters into his own hands and slept with his servant Hagar? So we see Abraham’s impatience or lack of trust in God led to the law and slavery to the law or a self righteous mentality, a will of our own, through the covenant at Mount Sinai (see Galatians 4:21-31). However, it was through the covenant with Abraham and the seed in Sarah that the promise was given and that is where we find our freedom, God’s blessing and joy… Patience represents God’s promises, blessings and His mercy in our lives.

Persevere in Patience. He is good, He does not forsake, He who calls you is faithful and He will surely do it. Do not give up, do not waiver, He will not forget you. If you’re waiting on a spouse, do not settle. If you’re praying for a family member, do not give up. If you’re struggling with finances, don’t stop giving. If you’re trying to have a child, don’t lose faith. If you’re seeking healing, keep on fighting. I know it’s hard and it may seem like eternity but He is always there. I do not say this in vain but as someone who has repeatedly learned the hard way and His way is better. If His eyes are on the sparrow how much more are they on us who are called according to His purpose? Walk in faith, cling to His promises and set your eyes on Him and be assured that during the process time is not being wasted but you’re becoming more like Him. … “because we know that suffering produces perseverance” Romans 5:1-5 and “Consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds…” James 1:2.

Knowing God and what He does

In early July the Lord started speaking to me about the balance of knowing Him and knowing what He does. Specifically out of Judges 2:6:

6 After Joshua had dismissed the Israelites, they went to take possession of the land, each to their own inheritance. 7 The people served the LORD throughout the lifetime of Joshua and of the elders who outlived him and who had seen ALL the great things the LORD had done for Israel...10 After that whole generation had been gathered to their ancestors, another generation grew up who knew neither the LORD nor what he had done for Israel. 11 Then the Israelites did evil in the eyes of the LORD and served the Baals.

I started to study the differences between the generation that was brought out of Egypt, the generation that stepped out in faith crossed the Jordan and took the promise land and then the generation that rose after and turned to other idols. What I found was the generation that both knew God and knew what He did, saw that not one of God's promises to them failed...that every inch of ground that the soles of their feet traveled was given to them. I want to be a part of a generation that lives in radical obedience to the Lord. This blog gives a small example of what it can look like when we apply what we know about Him in steps of faith.

I feel like those who have grown up in the church know a lot about God via what they have learned through veggie tales, reading the bible, numerous books, podcasts etc...I think you get the idea... However, when asked how have you seen God move or how has He used you, the memories are scattered or the answers are different from what we see demonstrated throughout the bible. Now I wrestle with this. Because I read the bible and desperately want to see those things in my life. I believe God is full of adventure and when we step out in faith and obedience we are stepping into an adventure with Him.

I co-Lead a small group of men down in Dallas and one of the things we really wanted to start pressing in 2011 is intercession and evangelizing.
So last night was our night to go out into Dallas and see what God had for us.

I had got an idea from listening to one of Matt Chandler's earlier sermons and a testimony I recently heard from one of my friends. So what Preston (co-leader) and I did was shared some examples of how we've listened to God and then respond by approaching a stranger and then praying/talking with them and how we are trying to cultivate an environment of obedience whether we see any fruit from that conversation or not.

Next I told them I was going to turn on one song and during that song I wanted them to ask God two questions 1. Where do I go 2. What does he/she look like? and then write down the first thing they either see or hear...

After the song was over everyone shared what they got and one of the guys, Jeremy, said he saw Cafe Brazil on Oak lawn and a guy in a white sweater, worn out jeans and then said he could have been just day dreaming or something haha. We then had everyone pair up and then go out (Luke 10)... I paired with Jeremy and took a new guy named Mark since he didn't hear or see anything. Jeremy continues to explain that he probably saw Cafe Brazil because he ate there two weeks ago and a white sweater because his roommate had one on earlier that day, so I'm like Jeremy shut up, we are going haha.

Mark is evidently skeptical about the whole thing because he had never done anything like this before. He doesn't really want to go and I could just see the tension and fear he had. (He explains later that he thought we were all crazy as we were listening to God and trying to get our "mission.")

We finally arrive to cafe brazil and even after we park, Jeremy says we can go to another Cafe Brazil if you guys want and I just ignore him and keep walking.

We walk inside and the hostess comes up to a guy who had walked in right before us, but he directs her to us since he was there to talk with the manager about a job. She asks us,a table for how many, and Jeremy tells her its ok we are waiting on someone. The guy, who is waiting for the manager, is wearing worn jeans, a white sweatshirt with a black jacket over it so I look at Jeremy and ask if that is him. Jeremy looks at him, the piece of paper, gets a weird look on his face and says I'm not really sure (which admits later he knew it was but fear crept in haha. why we go in pairs). I get the feeling it's definitely him so we went out on the porch and waited for him to come out. He walks out shortly after us with a distraught look on his face because the manager wasn't there and had apparently told him to come in because he might have work for him.

I introduce myself and ask him his name. Danny. I told him we were just at a bible study and while we were praying, Jeremy felt like God told him we needed to come here and talk to a guy in a white sweat shirt. He was like there's no way because I just walked in like a minute before you guys, did y'all follow me in? I said no, we didn't see you until we walked in so he was said ok I'll listen to what you guys have to say, what y'all wanna sit down or something and talk. Then he lifts up his shirt says I know the man and shows us a tattoo of Jesus on his chest haha.

I said yes let's sit down. I didn't feel the need to talk or explain but just to pray for him. As I'm praying I just start praying identity over him and I can sense that the presence of God is starting to move because a lot of the tension was removed and peace came upon us. As we say amen he looks back up and says no really, what is this about why are you guys here?

And I said, Danny look at me, Jesus sent us for you. We were miles away at my house and Jesus sent us here. Jeremy showed him the piece of paper that said cafe brazil, oak lawn, white sweater, worn jeans and he put his head down in his hands and just started weeping. I mean sobbing man. I look at Mark and his eyes are crazy big b/c it hit him. This was real, God sent us for Danny and his eyes begin to water as we sit around Danny and minister to him.

Danny sobs for a good two minutes or so and finally says through the tears...I just don't understand, life has been so hard, I've been in jail for the past 4 years and just got out two weeks ago and I'm trying to find out how to live life. I can't get a job because of all these tattoos and no one gives me a chance and it's been so tough. And then you guys show up and I just don't understand. He says years ago I would have run from people like you but tonight I decided to hear you out. He said I believe and I've read that Jesus died for my sins but I'm not on the level that y'all are at. I still drink, I smoke and I just got out of jail.

I told him that doesn't matter, that stuff is paid for at the cross. No one is perfect and that Jesus desire a relationship with him. We talk to him some more, I tell him this wasn't by accident, God loves him and He has more for him. I ask him how he feels and he says indescribable. Mark tells him, Danny you need to know that this has done so much to strengthen my faith, just your response alone has shown me how great and real God is.

I give him the address to the upper room, a ministry in that area, because he doesn't have a phone or transportation and it's right around the corner. He gives us a group hug and says he can't wait to go tell somebody about this.

Now I want to pause here and I want you to try and see things from Danny's perspective. A man with a past and story that most of can't even imagine. He has lived in the roughest conditions, seen the most extreme things, both sold and done drugs and in that moment, during that hour of his life, out of the 6 billion people on the face of this planet, God saw the brokenness and need in Danny's heart. And He responded, He came!!! by sending a couple of guys from a bible study to let Danny know God cares. This is something that goes far deeper than singing Jesus loves me in Sunday school. You cannot run from something like this, the revelation of His love for us changes us and strikes us at our core and we get to partner with Him showing people like Danny that He knows, He knows and that's why He came.

...As we drive back home, Mark says I think that is probably the most amazing thing I've ever seen. That probably did more good for me than him.

We saw what God does. Danny felt loved, Mark saw God move in power and Jeremy saw that he hears from God. It was a great night all around and there's more to be done in this city...